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Wednesday, August 22, 2012

One Bright Morning

One Bright Morning (A Nonsense Verse)

Ladies and jellybeans, hoboes and tramps,
Cockeyed mosquitoes and bow-legged ants
Admission is free, so pay at the door
Pull up a chair and sit on the floor.
I come before you to stand behind you,
To address you, not undress you.

Ladies and gentlemen, short and stout,
I will tell you a story I know nothing about
A story that can make statues shiver:
Christopher Cucumber sailed the Miss Sloppy River
In his right hand he held the Declaration of Indigestion
In his left, the Starred-Spangled Banana

One bright morning in the middle of the night,
Two dead boys got up to fight.
One was blind and the other couldn't see,
So they chose a dummy for a referee.
Back to back they faced one another,
Drew their swords and shot each other.

A blind man went to see the fair play,
And a dumb man went to shout “Hooray!”
A deaf policeman heard the noise,
And came to arrest those two dead boys.
Now they live in the middle of the block
In an upstairs-downstairs vacant lot.

A paralyzed donkey came walking by,
And kicked the copper in the middle of the eye,
Sent him through a nine-inch wall,
Into a dry ditch and drowned them all.

A long black hearse came to cart him away,
But he ran for his life and is still gone today.
I watched from the corner of a big round table,
I the only eyewitness to the facts of my fable;

If you don't believe this lie is true,
Ask the blind man—he saw it, too.
And through a knothole in a wooden brick wall,
The man with no legs had walked away.


  1. A great poem of nonsense! Thanks for posting, Maiden Star!

  2. I love this poem so much. It made me giggle.

    1. It made me laugh when I first read it, too! That's why I posted it. XD


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