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Friday, January 27, 2012

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Boots Has A Bad Day

2 comments:
This was something me and my group wrote in school for a Spanish skit, that we later translated:(Dora theme song parody)

Dora- Oh no! It’s 6:00! We’re going to be late for school!

Boots-* Yawns* Oh nooo (sarcastically)

Dora- Come on Boots! Let’s go! We need to leave by 6:45!

Dora- (Looking for stuff frantically).

Dora- We need a pen, some pencils, some paper, lunch, a ruler, and library books!

Boots - Don’t forget your binder.

Dora- Oh yea! Thanks Boots! You’re the best! (Puts everything in bag)

Boots- Yep I know.
________________________________________________________

Dora- Ok Boots! What’s the shortest route to take?

Boots- I don’t know, you have a map why are you asking me?

Dora- Lets ask the map!

Dora- Can you say map?

Boots- Yes Dora I can say map.

Dora- Say map with me.

Boots- Why?

Dora- So we can get to school!

Boots- *ugh* Map, map, map.

Dora- Say it louder!

Boots- MAP...MAP...MAP!
(Angrily)

Dora- Can you say it even louder?

Boots- Nope.

Map- I’m tired, leave me alone. I have ears. I heard you the first time.

Dora (on the verge of tears) - Why is he being so mean and unpleasant? Why? WHHY?

Map- I’m a high school dropout. It was just so I was the only one they could find.
But if you insist…

Boots- Oh my gosh, not this again.

Map: (Tired) If there's a place you got to go
I'm the one you need to know
I'm the Map
I'm the Map
I'm the Map
If there's a place you got to get
I can get you there I bet
I'm the Map (12 times. As Map is nearing the 12th time he falls asleep.)

Map (Jotting awake) - Dora wants the shortest route to get to school on time. Tell Dora she has to go to: Library, Mountain, School. (Repeats like 8 times)

Dora- Okay, we have to go to the bridge first, can you see the bridge?

Boots- Dora we’ve been over this 100 times, it’s right in front of you. Look before you ask.

Dora- There it is!

Boots- There you go.

Dora- (Come on vaminos song parody)
_________________________________________________________

Boots- Yay we’re at the bridge.

Dora- (Come on vaminos song parody)

Boots- We made it to the bridge stop singing.

Dora- (Come on vaminos song parody)

Boots- DORA WE MADE IT TO THE BRIDGE STOP SINGING!

Dora- Okay come on Boots let’s walk across the bridge!

*enter troll*

Troll- I am the troll who lives under the bridge! Name three things I can carry in my bag.

Boots- Can we just go? I am not having the best morning.

Troll- Answer the riddle first...

Dora- Some pencils! A binder! A dictionary!

Troll- Oh no, you’re right! But I’m still not letting you pass.

Boots- I’M WALKING PAST WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT, there’s literally 3 feet from here to there!

Troll- No you’re not; you interrupted my beauty sleep.

Boots- (smacks troll in face.)

*troll falls on the floor, knocked out*

Boots- Let’s go Dora. (Mutters) Beauty sleep. Sheeh.

Dora- Okay, come on vaminos -

Boots- NOO!
_______________________________________________________

(Swiper cackles)

Dora- Did you hear something weird?

Boots- No that’s totally something you’d hear in nature.

Dora- Do you see Swiper? (Puts arm around Swiper’s shoulder)

Boots- Dora, he’s in plain sight!

Dora- What are you doing here Swiper?

Swiper:.What’cha got there?

Dora- It’s my binder!

Swiper- ...It’s...that’s a pretty nice looking binder there.

Dora- (Gasping) Don’t let Swiper take my binder! Say Swiper no swiping! Swiper no Swiping! Swiper no-

Boots - Nah, I’m not in the mood, my throat hurts from all this singing.

(Swiper takes binder and throws it away.)

Boots- Oops too late, you see, what do I tell you Dora, that reciting a stupid rhyme completed with a hand gesture does absolutely nothing to stop a lunatic? Now we have to go look for the binder.

Swiper- He he he, now you’ll definitely be late! Mwa ha ha ha ha!!! (begins to run away, when Boots grabs Swiper by the tail).

Boots- You know what fox, I’m tired of you always throwing our stuff into random trees and bushes and making me look for it, its not funny, just go home. And I mean it! If you don’t I’m telling on your mother!

Swiper- (snaps fingers) ohhh mannn (runs away)

Dora- Good job Boots!!! Let’s go get the Binder!

Boots- It’s in that tree!

Dora- Do you see the binder?

Boots- It’s in that tree.

Dora- Is this the binder?

Boots- No that’s a fireman (fireman waves.)

Dora- Is this the binder?

Boots- No, that’s a pen.

Dora- Is this the binder?

Boots- Hi doggy.

Dora- Is this the binder?

Boots: No, that’s a bike.

Dora: Is this the binder?

Boots- Good job!

Dora- Okay let’s keep going!

Boots- (sarcastically) Yaaaay.

Dora- singing again “come on vaminos song” (Boots rolls eyes)
_________________________________________________

Boots- We made it to the library. (Mumbles) About time.

Dora- Where do we go next?

Boots- The mountain.

Dora- Ok! *Sings and walks*
____________________________________________________________

Oh no! How do we get around the mountain? Can we go UNDER the mountain?

Boots: Ya, cuz that’s possible!

Dora- Can we go AROUND the mountain?

Boots: Ya, in a couple years!

Dora: Can we go through the mountain?

Boots: Ya, let me just pull a train out of my back pocket.

Dora: Do you see anyone that can help us get through the mountain?

Boots: Hey, is that a purple squirrel?

Dora- Yes, it’s our good friend Tico! Do you know how we can get through the mountain?

Tico: Yes! Use you backpack!

Dora- OK, let’s use the backpack to turn into an airplane to take us over the mountain.
          Or, we can turn it into a boat to take us around the mountain.
          Yea but flying is funner.

Boots- But boat is less annoying. Anyway, I can sleep on the way.

Dora- Find, let’s take the boat.

(After song the backpack turns into a canoe. They get in. However, they get stuck.)

Dora- What happened?

Tico: The canoe is flooding! Do you have something we can use to stop the flooding?

Dora: Check my backpack! Say backpack!

Backpack: *sings* (Backpack song parody)

Backpack: Dora needs a tool to help Tico fix the boat!!! We should get nails to put it back together! Are these nails?

Boots: (Sighs) No.

Backpack: No, that’s a pen! Are these the nails?

Boots: (Louder) NO.

Backpack: Right, that’s a book! Are these the nails?

Boots: NO!!!!!!

Backpack: Right, that’s a taco, not nails! Are these the nails?

Boots: (Crying) Yes! (Hands them to Tico.)

Backpack: Yum Yum Yum Yum Yum! Delicioso!

(Tico fixes canoe).

Dora: Yay! (They go around mountain.)
_____________________________________________________________

Dora- Ooo, look a sign that says free cookies inside that cave, let’s go get them.

Boots- Wait, wait, wait. We have been going this way for six years and now we see a piece of loose leaf that says free cookies and you want to get them? Do know how many other things can be waiting inside for a bunch of morons that actually thought there were free cookies inside?

Dora- Yeah, let’s find out!

Boots- You’re insane. I am not going in there, not after all this way. I am not budging an inch. You can go in there with your purple squirrel and get trapped, but I am not going in there with you.

Dora- Please?

Boots- No.

Dora- Pretty pretty please with a banana on top?

Boots- Nope. I’ll give you cookies when we get home.

Dora- Pwomise?

Boots- Promise.

Dora- Okey dokey. As long they have chocolate chips!

Boots- (Sigh). We made it to school on time. A miracle.

Dora- Hurry the bell is going to ring!

Boots- It’s only 7:30 school starts at 8:00 what are you talking about?

Dora- Hurry, let’s go!

Boots- Can we sing this song first?

Dora- Oh yeah, the song

Everyone- Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun we did it we did it yeahhhhh vamicimos we did it song parody.

________________________________________________________________

Epilogue

Dora- So Boots, what was your favorite part of today?

Boots- Being asleep before you woke me up.

Dora- My favorite part was when we were singing! (Dora takes breath as if to sing).

Boots- Don’t start singing again. Why, for the past six years, I’ve been forced to......

*enter security guard*

Guard- (Sternly) Excuse me, but what are you two doing here?

Dora- Why, we’re here to go to school and learn! (Smiles angelically)

Guard- Don’t you know that you aren’t supposed to be here?

Boots- (Cautiously, restraining anger) What do you mean?

Guard- Today is Saturday.

Boots- $#!%.

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